Judgments are so relentless.
How many people have they prevented
from being their own person?

Some sentiments are so senseless;
when they create a person so careless;
so heartless.

Haven't we gotten over this?
Haven't we all ready gone through this?

Or every time:
was it the point we would miss?

"He broke up with me and his excuse was that he needed to find himself. I didn't have the heart to tell him he wasn't worth looking for."

Hahaha

This is the best phrase I have heard in a while;
too bad no one told me it a a little over a year ago.
:]

"The world's a blur, accented by her."

"Some days the world can seem so dim,
I'm glad it's accented by him."

~Written by Tracy Hunter and her boyfriend;
just about the cutest little piece of poetry I've ever heard.
http://www.thuntress.tumblr.com

You let my words fly right through you
when their aim was to actually move you.

Why can't the things you do
match up with the words you give, too?

Life will undo what is untrue
but you don't get to redo
who you've grown into.

*I love being able to address
so many different people
and so many different scenarios
at once.
*I fucking love writing. It simplifies life.
It simplifies people.

I know some people who exist

but cease to live;
somewhere along the line
they lost the best parts of them.

You were a sunset;
who turned out to be negligent.
You turned up in the morning
and never caught up to the evening;
your sun had no choice. She left.

You were careless
with the gifts you were given.
Listlessly, you picked the life
you have chosen.
You gave out your word
but forgot them when life said,
"Show them".

You were only ordinary;

with a mask to match each accessory.
You don't remember me
but, at some point, we met up with your extraordinary.
Tell me, why'd you ever give up on being legendary?
Or simply living a life worth its own story?

What's your hurry?
Weigh your worry.
Wake up!
Restore the morning
to its glory.

Passion is only a piecemeal of my promise;
*I love you with no intentions to ever stop this.*
And you're one lover I never could resist;
the second you showed me
romance and this world do co-exist.

I.
love.
you.
Taurino.
Perez.
<3

Life can not be lived as if it is some catastrophe;
you must ~bask in its simplicity~
to figure out what it means to be;
what it means to fly free.

Ask a million questions.

When there's only ever ONE answer.

You know it; we both do.
I swear.

She wanted to play games she would deny even existed. He wanted to teach her the perspective she had been missing. Their compromise, endless back-and-forth meetings; touch-and-go feelings, exploration of what each one was seeing. It turned into limitless seasons without even a year receding. It turned into miles and miles of effort on her part before his heart began the slow process of believing and again, breathing.

another piece to my story... haha I'll put it all together at some point.

He may have never picked or bought her flowers, but it was not because he didn't care for her. It was because Holden made her realize all the flowers of the world were all ready hers.

"Picking flowers is like robbing life and I would never want to give you a gift that has no potential to grow because I aided in its demise," he explained. "Stealing the Earth of its nature to give, solely, to one person diminishes the beauty and power of that flower. Look beyond that hill, pretty, do you see that lady teaching her baby to smell the flowers?" She did. "Well, what if someone had come and stripped the land of these flowers so they could sell them to people who would bring them home to their wife so that she could smile for less than five minutes, feel loved for the day, and then forget about them tomorrow until eventually they die because they were deprived of their natural home? Those individuals would have stolen that baby and the mother's moment just now, the moment were having right now, the moments people will have that come here in the future. You can't multiply love and beauty unless you leave it open for other true hearts to feel its power, too."

He didn't give her flowers but, instead, lead her to their fields. She immediately realized he was giving her the gift of the world; yet, all this time, it was right in front of her anyway. What he really gave her was the most intimate gift of all; the gift of rediscovery, the gift of his thoughts, his perspectives; not so that he could change her but, to instead, watch her grow with new ideas. He liked the spin she might even give to his own ideas, now, as she was absorbing some as her own. Like the luscious flowers in the field needed sustenance to grow, so did she and so did everyone; he acted as her water, her sunshine that day, and in, many, many more to come.


He wouldn't say "I love you" excessively but rather, made her feel it, incessantly. Which is ultimately degrees more important. Anyone can say a storybook full of wonderfully crafted lines that all mean "I love you". Anyone can robotically repeat that phrase until their lungs are raw. But what really grabs a hold of your heart is when they put those statements into their every-day actions. When daily, you can see in their eyes love is not only consciously what they feel for you, but, *also, subconsciously consuming them*; and, ~infinitely, what they are going to astound you with, indefinitely~.

"O Lord... Have pity on those who may conquer the world but *~NEVER join the good fight within themselves~*. But pity also those who have won the good fight within themselves, and now find themselves in the streets and the bars of life because they were unable to conquer the world. Because neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says, 'He who heeds my words I will liken to a wise man who built his house on rock'...
Have pity on those who are fearful of taking up a pen, or a paintbrush, or an instrument, or a tool because they are afraid that someone has already done so better than they could, and who feel themselves to be unworthy to enter the marvelous mansion of art. But have even more pity on those who, having taken up the pen, or the paintbrush, or the instrument, or the tool, *have turned inspiration into a paltry thing*, *~and yet feel themselves to be better than others~*. Neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says, 'For there is nothing covered that will not be revealed, nor hidden that will not be known'." -Coehlo, "The Pilgrimage", Chapter - Personal Vices; short & sweet & EVERYONE should read; maybe more of it to come later, but this one struck a chord.

Songs to do future hoop vids to :)

"Low Road" by Grace Potter or really anything Grace Potter
"Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros
"Set the Fire to the Third Bar" by Snow Patrol
hmmmmoe. of course :)
maybe "The World at Large" by Modest Mouse; but if not that song one of their songs definitely.
"Where is the Love?" by Black Eyed Peas

I need sweet settings to hoop at;
(I want to make a silhouette video pronto but where, oh where? would be the best place.)
And to learn more tricks to make that many videos interesting.
And more songs to add to this list.
And then even more tricks come the new songs.
And friends who hoop to join me! Because the more hoopers in a video, the sweeter it is!!

I love that this passion was discovered!
Thank you, Courtney Westerkamp is all I have to say :)

And thanks to other hoopers who have shared (and will continue sharing) their skills with me. This summer has taken that hobby to a new height and I’m never coming down <3. It’s crazy how something so simple can transform your daily living in such little time if your just open to it…

the beginning of a short story... until I have time to finish it :)

"When you love someone, you have to give up the right to ever lose them. Through the act of loving; you connect to them, and therefore will never forget them," Holden told her.

"I wouldn't be willing to lose you, does that mean I love you?" Lily asked shyly but filled with all of her usual intentions.

She didn't understand. Here she was, yet again, turning it back to herself instead of "them", instead of looking at love on a universal scale as opposed to her personal one, instead of a conversation of what love is, what love transcends, instead of just looking at it without her unruly ego involved. Complacently, and like he usually did, Holden simply ignored her question.

They walked along the outer ridge of the beach line before it dipped down into the tide. She was barefoot running along the sea in a bikini. But to him, she was treading on the moonlight, unself-consciously naked, dancing before his eyes. He never even saw her undressed but could paint a portrait with how vividly he could decipher her body and the curves with which she was blessed.
Capturing her demeanor, her behavior, her eyes of wonder; is what would put his mind, hand, art, and most importantly, his heart to the test.

When you believe in multiple worlds that collide to make up the larger one; everything makes more sense. Your mistakes. Your successes. Your dress-ups. Your messes. What we perceive makes up our reality and clearly what you see and have seen will be different from me. The world is a collage of inner realities. Reality often is born by a correspondence between all of our memories but is limited by our building of boundaries.

There’s a world built by you.

There’s a world built by me.

Combine them; & find a world built by we.

“Emotions are like wild horses.” -Paulo Coehlo

Maybe each country is a separate emotion of the Earth’s identity. We fight because not everyone wants the responsibility of controlling their reign. Tell me is it the people or just their fate that’s insane?

“Emotions are like wild horses.” -Paulo Coehlo

Maybe each country is a separate emotion of the Earth’s identity. We fight because not everyone wants the responsibility of controlling their end of the reign. Tell me is it the people or the world they live in, that’s insane?

Drawing Credit: Michelle Imparato
Idea Credit: Brandon Boyd from Incubus
(I kinda wanna print it out and color it too!)

Season Treason

The past never ends before it becomes your future.

Like every Summer

come Fall, you still wonder

how the sun ever sets forgetting the flower.

But as the leaves transform their color

all of a sudden you remember;

the world is still a sight to see in the snow of December.

breathescape

(I've reached a compromise, I'm keeping my blog as well. You have better features or maybe it's just because I know how to use this better.)

You need to breathe; escape.
Take a step before you leap.
Whoever said this journey wasn't steep?
Just watch it structure into its beautiful shape.

Breathe. Leap.

Breathe.

It matters not who you're meant to be

but rather how you live this mystery;

and many people have taught to me

souls are simply Life’s endless energy.

We’re radiant. Don’t you see?

Our lives are anything but minuscule.

You have to find the fire to feed the fuel.

You have to live out the pieces to experience the whole.

And learn, love is not something you let go,

but rather plant it and feel it grow.

Blogger, it's been fun but I believe I'm upgrading to tumblr; seems to be more accessible to other writers like me than this blog has been...

My new link is
http://asubconsciousdesignofrhyme.tumblr.com/

There's nothing there yet but there will be
:)

For Mark Khoury R.I.P.

Mark Khoury, you were by far one of the nicest individuals I have ever had the pleasure of being friends with. I refuse to say good-bye because you will always live on in everyone's heart that you have ever met. We won't say good-bye; it's only a farewell until we meet again. When you live a life of love; your legacy becomes love and that legacy lives on, for all time, and is NEVER defeated. When you love someone, you never lose them and you were surrounded by many souls that loved you so you will never be lost; you forever live on in our hearts and memories. Love is not limited to the physical world; love is accessible in every realm and travels through the barriers of time and physicality. You are energy, Mark, and you will never be destroyed; though your physical presence has left momentarily, you will forever be FELT.

I feel like we didn't take advantage of our friendship while we had the time and for that I will forever be sorry for the memories that never got made. After high school, we lost touch for about a year until I saw you at Kevin's again but still we conversed like no time had passed at all and I remember how you made me smile. Watch over Kevin the best you can, please. You meant the world to him and he means the world to me; he needs your guidance to get through this. Show him he has to live for not only himself now, but for you also.

Still, even though we lost touch, I can still vividly remember our best moments together -

I remember when we dated. I was a sophomore, I believe, and you were a junior. It didn't last too long, though, and I remember exactly why. After a month or so you found out I smoked weed and, in the hallway, you broke up with me. Within two months time, though, you called me and invited me to your house. You asked me if I wanted to blaze. I remember walking down to your house and we proceeded to smoke out of an apple until I got frustrated with the idea and said we should just go to my house and get a pipe. I love this memory so much. You are the only one I ever smoked out of an apple with. I think I'll leave it that way for the rest of my life.

I remember the first DAY you got your license; the FIRST time you were allowed to drive alone. You took me on a date and, come to think of it, it may have been the first ACTUAL date I had ever been taken on. I remember how worried your mom was and how mine was so nonchalant and just didn't care or worry about anything. But not yours. She requested you call her at every stopping point; even when you got to my house which was literally TWO minutes from yours. We laughed about it the whole time but when the movie was done (and it's only logical that I don't even remember the film haha) we tried to drag the time out. I think we told her the movie was longer than it actually was and hung out by the Appalachian trails between our two houses. :)

I remember those Appalachian trails with you, too. One time, I remember us sneaking out and meeting up on the trails and walking them in the pitch dark. I don't remember why we didn't do that more often...

I remember how sporty you were. Football, wrestling, baseball; did it ever end with you? ;) I remember watching your baseball games and hearing about you all the time over the intercom at school with all your sports. You were dedicated, Mark, and you were committed; you had passion. You were amazing and you helped carry our school to many victories; even with how shitty our football teams were =P. Your mom put your football jersey outside your house; I see it swinging in the wind every time I pass and it reminds me of every time you wore it at school on game days. You were so proud; you really loved your sports and I respect every inch of that. Have I told you how remarkable you were?

I remember your hot tub. Oh, your hot tub. Haha. I remember being in there with you, I think James, too, probably Kevin and possibly Jeremy. I remember we played an endless game of "Never Have I Ever" and I can still pretty distinctively hear the sound of your laughter; your belly deep laughter.

I think I remember going with you to your first moe. show ever. I have a feeling James was there, and maybe Jeremy, too. You know how moe.ments go, though, they're always a little foggy ;). I know I remember O.A.R. with you and I believe Kyle O. and maybe James, yet again. In fact, that is where that picture above was taken. I remember you guys looking out for me since a "boyfriend" who just randomly stopped talking to me was to be there. More importantly, though, I remember jamming out to one of our favorite songs, "Delicate Few". Damn, were we belting that song out. Now, whenever I "relax for a delicate few", I will surely think of you. :)

I remember your puppies!!!! Since your family bred them, you would always show me the newborns and they would fit in the palm of my hand, sometimes. I love this memory of you, too. You are the only person in the world to share the joy of newborn puppies with me. And I thank you.

I remember playing frisbee, for hours, in the Appalachian Trail parking lot with Kyle O. and James Drake.

I remember beeping every time I passed your house when you were outside for the past 5 years of my life.

I remember how completely random it was to find out your family was really good friends with Michelle Barclay's.

I remember our most recent trail walk with Kevin and Jeremy and all the old cop tales we had to tell each other. I remember planning Kev's 21st which didn't exactly go according to plan but was fun nonetheless with me having to play sober nurse/cop in Kev's new apartment. I remember you being really drunk, too. Haha I think I was the only sober person there and I spent most of the time in the bathroom anyway with an obliterated Kevin. I think you helped us put him to bed when the toilet stopped being his pillow..... Finally lol.

I remember the last time I saw you. We were at quick-chek. You asked me if I knew were any nugget was at. I said unfortunately not, I had no money, I just got a new car. You saw it, you liked it and you said "You would get a Mitsubishi." I didn't know what you meant by that comment and I still don't; I just wish I had asked you to go for a drive instead of rushing to wherever it was I was going...






I leave space for any more memories that might come; for the memories other people will remember about you with me. We're going to carry you with us now, Mark, so don't think the memories ever really end. You are monumental and your name does you justice because you surely have left your mark on this world. I regret not telling you enough how remarkable I think you are but we just grew apart when you graduated; we grew apart because I did something dumb once (even though I don't think you even remembered this) but I apologize. It was mostly my fault we stopped talking but I'm extremely grateful we repaired our friendship before this tragedy occurred. I love you, Mark, even if I didn't say it enough times when you were physically present to hear it. You surely have taught me to take full advantage of my friendships and to let each and every last person know how much they really mean to me.

I love you and may you rest in peace, my friend.

Mark, you are forever remembered and unconditionally treasured. ♥