Often we look at loving someone so much and them not having equal intensity in loving us or them losing the intensity in which they love us back as a failure. As something bad, terrible, depressing. As nearly life-ending especially after putting so much time and dedication into that person. Yet, after my years of experience, after trial and error, and after feeling success on a daily basis; I come to realize maybe it was not such a bad thing. In fact, I look back with an air of happiness for all the love that existed inside me. The love that rewarded me with the gift of internal sight. The love that rewards me with a gift of being able to see what is often overlooked; our truest identities, the person inside of us we meet when we work in the path of our greatest potentials. Of course, losing what you want will always yield terrible emotions but what one does not realize is that you love the person because you see how truly remarkable they can be. Or you've seen how truly remarkable they can be and, for some reason, it's slipping away from them. They do not want to be that incredible self anymore, the deity of their own being.
It's depressing to watch them un-evolve or simply not evolve at all into the person you look into their eyes and in their soul, you can see. In some of their actions, the person you can feel inside them. In their daily existence, the sliver of their true self you see them, at times, be. It's disturbing for you to watch this but no one ever stops to think, "aren't you the lucky one?" You become so caught up in trying to "help" them, to holding on tightly, to not letting those grains of sand slip through your fingers even though we all know sand belongs on the beach, that you miss how much you have with or without that person. You've seen them and not a single thing they ever do can take that away from you. Not just seen them as in you physically opened your eyes and they were there but you have seen the light within them, the truth within them, the beautiful, complete being we are all capable of striving towards. It's not just literally seeing them, it's feeling what they hold within them. It's seeing who they are in the here and now and beyond. It's their eternalness, the God within them, the Self that remains so deeply hidden within all of us; many times, the Self that is not even ever found.
Yet, that person is not ready or is afraid to see that being in themselves for whatever the reason. I could go on a tirade and list just some of the reasons, some of the reasons I've seen in several people over the course of my own experiences but the reasons have no implications in this conversation. They mean nothing. All anyone needs to know about them is that, obviously, they exist. Do not ever be in denial about their existence. Also that, you can not change them no matter how hard you try or have tried countless times over. You can search in an encyclopedia of explanations to come up with the best one to enlighten this person with but if they are not ready to transform their own life, they will not. Give them freedom, their life is not yours to bring to light especially when it interferes in your ability to see your own.
It's like gazing into the same mirror with someone but having completely different views of the images staring back at you. The person in love sees the truest image, the pure form of the person but that person cannot see it. They stare at themselves as if a fog is between them and the mirror. This fog are those reasons.
It's not a joyous occasion to go through this experience but it is not a failure. We need to see we got the most beautiful piece of the equation; life introduced us to another person's spirit, soul, deity, being. We need acceptance; we need to understand we are not them, we need to loosen our grip and let them do what they think they need to do to live. Maybe they'll learn, maybe they'll come around, maybe they will stop self-inflicting their development and, at some point, flourish again within it but, whatever they do, it is their decision alone, not that of anybody else. When you truly love someone, you can watch that grain of sand get distant and hope to God they once rise up again, even if it is not with your wave this time.
If they ever come around, believe in the miracle of their true self. If they don't, believe in it still; and be grateful, be humble, feel privileged above all that you were one person or one of the people that were given the gift of capacity to see that being inside them.
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